For all the days we are alive should see ourselves as being ‘under construction’ - daily being formed and matured in the Lord. Just as the apostle Paul taught (Ephesians 4:11-13), as Christians, our spiritual lives are not to stay the same, but rather to be constantly rooted and built up in the Lord, growing in our faith and increasing in maturity. We see some further areas to help us:

1. We need to grow up in our relationships (Proverbs 12:26, 17:17, 19:11; Colossians 3:13-14; 1 Corinthians 15:58 AMP).

2. We need to grow up in our responsiveness (Ecclesiastes 1:14; Proverbs 26:12, 3:7; Matthew 11:29;1 Peter 5:5; Matthew 7:24)

3. We need to grow in our reaction to discipline (Proverbs 12:1, 15:5, 3:11-12, 13:24, Proverbs 10:17; Hebrews 12:6)

Apply

1. We need to grow up in our relationships

Immaturity – temperamental: Children are often very quick to both make and break friendships. They can go from having a best friend one day to not being friends with them the next. For a while, a friend is new and exciting, the 'flavour of the month' then they disappear. They can both make and drop friends easily, and be enticed by wealth, charisma and charm – how a person appears, rather than who they really are (Proverbs 12:26). For the immature Christian, there is no emotional balance or stability in relationships. They go all into the friendship, spending lots of time together and sometimes becoming inseparable, and then the total opposite happens when offence and unforgiveness enters and the friendship suddenly ends. Being temperamental isn’t good for the person nor the people around them.

Maturity – faithful: A mature Christian is faithful and consistent. They don’t fly off the handle or cut off a relationship when someone says or does something they don’t like or agree with. It’s not that there are never any issues in their friendships, but rather that they know and put the word of God into practice on how to be a faithful person in their relationships (Proverbs 17:17; Proverbs 19:11). A mature Christian stays together in covenant relationship, even if disappointed by friends. They would rather overlook an offense than forsake the friendship (Colossians 3:13-14). Mature Christians are quick to forgive, valuing covenant friendship over any temporary grievance. They want to keep unity in the church family and enjoy the blessing of real, stable friendships, which is so different to how friendships often operate in the world. Covenant friendship is steadfast and enduring. You can count on a mature person to be faithful in a relationship and also to be faithful in whatever they put their hand to do – not just doing the minimum, but going above and beyond because it’s the mature attitude of the heart (1 Corinthians 15:58 AMP). Are you consistent and faithful, or temperamental, being quick to make and break off friendships? Do you give your best to people, or try to get away with the minimum?

2. We need to grow up in our responsiveness

Immaturity - needs repeated telling: Repeatedly having to tell a child reveals something deeper going on in the attitude of that child. Essentially they are not valuing the instruction of the parent and sees that what they’re doing is more important. Often, immature Christians can be like the children in these scenarios being “wise in our own eyes”. We think of ourselves as being very busy, filling our lives with many activities but neither feel we have time to nor really value following the instructions God gives us. At the end of King Solomon’s life, he recognised the fruitlessness of doing things other than God’s will or direction (Ecclesiastes 1:14). Many times people want the overall direction of God for their life and future, but do not choose to follow the instructions in the Bible that God gives for how to we are to live every day. Even though we may have heard and read the 10 commandments so many times, do we ever lie, or want what others have, or put something or someone in first place of our lives instead of God? For the immature Christian, just because they know something doesn’t mean they are actually putting it into practice – they’d rather do what they want (Proverbs 26:12). Immature Christians look around judgmentally at others without recognising their need to grow in obeying the word of God. There is a blindness to hard heartedness, which often makes them harder to work with than anyone else, yet they are more in need than anyone else (Proverbs 3:7).

Maturity - eager to learn: In stark contrast to the immature Christian who needs repeated telling because “they are wise in their own eyes” The mature Christian recognises that Jesus said we are to learn from Him (Matthew 11:29). They don’t need constant persuading but are ready to learn from the Lord, from their pastors, their spiritual leaders, and from anywhere and everywhere that builds them up in their faith and in spiritual maturity. A mature person can say, without choking, "I was wrong, please show me, please help me". They don’t need repeated telling before they listen and obey. And they also don’t pick and choose the scriptures they want to obey, rather they take the all the instruction of the Bible, not only the promises of blessing and help. They know that following God’s instruction leads to life (1 Peter 5:5; Matthew 7:24) It’s not that this always come naturally. It’s a decision to be humble and not just dismiss things that might be challenging or uncomfortable but will grow us in our faith merely as ‘suggestions’ or ‘opinions’ - but to listen attentively and be responsive, to take it on board and be quick to apply it. So how eager to learn are you? Do you listen to the word of God quickly put it into practice?

3. We need to grow in our reaction to discipline

Immaturity - fights shy of discipline: An infant or adolescent will often push to find their limits, seeing how far they can risk their way to prove themselves right or reassure themselves that “everything will still work out ok” to minimise any bad outcomes. An immature Christian knows there must be an oversight in their life, but wants to keep it to minimum – which can lead them even to present half truths or to conceal things. They want to get away with minimum accountability and maximum independence in case they are told something they don’t want to hear. Immaturity means that if they can get away with something, they will, and if called to account, they will resent it (Proverbs 12:1; Proverbs 15:5). Rather than proactively seeking out spiritual cover themselves, for fear of being corrected or challenged, they will wait to be sought out by their leader. Even if a good and Godly leader gets too close for comfort, they are often quick to shout that it’s "heavy shepherding" or the leader is being controlling, in order to take the pressure off themselves.

Maturity - loves discipline: A mature Christian loves discipline because they understand that Discipline is for our good and is a way of God showing His love for us as His children. They don’t skim over the scriptures that teach us on how important discipline is for our lives, nor do they get offended when they are corrected because they know it’s essential for them to be able to grow in maturity and Godly character (Proverbs 3:11-12; Proverbs 13:24; Hebrews 12:6). A mature Christian wants to build safeguards into their life. Contrary to what the world teaches, they seek out accountability from pastors, leaders and fellow Christians, and see correction as positive and not negative.

Would you say you are a faithful person or temperamental? Do you need repeated telling or are you eager to learn? Do you fight against discipline or do you love being corrected? These are not all easy things to hear, and our flesh doesn’t love being challenged in this way, but understanding and applying this will not only help us to grow up, but will be a blessing to many others (Proverbs 10:17). As we grow up in the Lord, we will help many others encounter the love, life and liberty of Jesus as well.