SE 87: When You're Smothered By Another

The 3 O'Clock Wake Up Call

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SE 87: When You're Smothered By Another

July 23, 2024

This Week's Listener Question:

My partner always wants me to go everywhere he goes. He won’t go to parties, games,

church, or vacations without me. It feels like he’s smothering me and I need some

space. What should I do without hurting his feelings?

Announcements:

Summer Webinar Series – You are invited to join Laura Busse and Dr. Michaelle Knight

August 8 – Press On with Perseverance and Make a Plan

Hope to see you there!

SOUL Group Questions:

To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions.

1. Reflecting on your family of origin and caregivers when you were a child, how

would you describe how your needs were met? What messages did you receive

about how to express your emotions?

2. Did you grow up seeing any of these patterns of anxious attachment – clinging,

controlling, people pleasing, helplessness, placating, or jealousy? Do you see

them in your relationships today?

3. Why do you think anxious attachment styles are common in relationships?

4. In what ways can we be connected to others yet still differentiated?

5. Celebrate one of your relationships that feels connected and you still have your

own autonomy. Or choose one you’d like to move in that direction. Make a plan

to communicate or celebrate with them.

Resources:

Attachment Style Assessment – Take the Quiz

Wired for Love by Stan Tatkan – Book

Attachment Styles in Adult Relationships - Complete Guide

Have a question for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com

Learn more about Laura Busse and invite her to speak where you are – HERE

Learn more about Laura’s ministry The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call – HERE

Learn more about Christine Ruth, counseling practice, and future retreats – HERE

SE 95: A House Divided - Navigating Thanksgiving's Family Challenges

November 12, 2024

This Week’s Listener Question: Thanksgiving is in two weeks. I really don’t want to host my extended family because we’re divided on several key topics. How do I navigate family division and still enjoy the holidays? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When you think about Thanksgiving this year, what feelings and thoughts come up for you? 2. Think of a time when you had “gridlock” with a partner or family member. How have you learned to love in the midst of conflict or disagreements? 3. In what ways could you practice self-care and self-compassion in this post-election and pre-holiday season? 4. Why do you think it’s important to H.A.L.T. (hungry, angry, lonely, tired) a conversation until you can take care of yourself? 5. Where are your safe spaces that you can express your genuine feelings and be present for others to express theirs? Resources: Laura is hosting 3 free classes during the holidays to help prepare you for all the big emotions that come up this time of year. To register – https://www.griefandhope.org/event-list To sign up for one-on-one grief and/or faith support with Laura, visit http://www.griefandhope.org/ To ask Laura to speak at your event – https://www.laurabusse.com/ Have a question for us? Send it to mailto:questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura’s ministry The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call – https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth, counseling practice, and future retreats – http://www.christineruth.com/

SE 94: When You're Lost in the Middle

October 29, 2024

This Week’s Listener Question: I’m in a really uncomfortable space. I used to be in breadwinner for our family. Now my husband and I switched places. He’s going to work and I’m staying home with the kids. I feel lost, without direction, in this new role. How do I motivate myself in this weird space? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. What uncomfortable transition or liminal space do you find yourself in? 2. What different emotions are you noticing in your current space? 3. How can you create “sacred space” in this season of your life? What needs to shift in order to do so? 4. Laura and Christine talked about slowing down, honoring your emotions, reflecting, and trusting the process. Which it the hardest for you to do? Why do you think so? 5. What’s your one take away from this podcast you want to remember and apply in your life? Resources: In Midlife by Murray Stein – https://www.amazon.com/midlife-jungian-perspective-murray-stein/dp/1630510890/ref=sr_1_1?crid=9zretnfyq0mj&dib=eyj2ijoimsj9.nftp6i4yg7jbqlbmylrvdeyusbup5rd77gomankhl0ujfv08tc993mvauqcjdim2khzgiq8d509gqqhc7zr9qglo6s--9ggfpgl-yj0bswfp5ouqeg0b8y1fbj5cn4jxpbuvfu4mwghirzvioptbye3y_ms_gy8e1ia8xxfexy0heupceorati2edukj7pvr.aio9o5fymae1ttnt_4arfknmce58wmdcpaqsozuvq4q&dib_tag=se&keywords=murray+stein+midlife&qid=1730140967&sprefix=in+midlife++murra%2caps%2c247&sr=8-1 To sign up for one-on-one grief and/or faith support with Laura, visit http://www.griefandhope.org/ Have a question for us? Send it to mailto:questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura’s ministry The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call – https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth, counseling practice, and future retreats – http://www.christineruth.com/

SE 93: I'm Boiling Mad. Turn Up the Heat!

October 14, 2024

This Week’s Listener Question: I grew up in a house where it was wrong to express your anger so I learned to suppress it. Now I’m conflicted because anger feels like a natural response when you’ve been wronged. What do you think? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. What were you taught about anger when you were growing up? 2. Think of a situation that got your angry. What need was not being met? What boundary was being violated? How did you respond? 3. How has anger inspired you to make positive changes in your life? 4. When have you seen others create positive impact in the world because they were angry about something? 5. Where do you need to “turn up the heat” and express your anger in order to bring about greater intimacy, truth, or growth? Make a plan and go for it! Resources: To sign up for one-on-one grief support with Laura, visit http://www.griefandhope.org/ Have a question for us? Send it to mailto:questions@soulenchilada.com Learn more about Laura’s ministry The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call – https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/ Learn more about Christine Ruth, counseling practice, and future retreats – http://www.christineruth.com/