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How to Get out of the Hot Seat While Remaining Engaged

Greg Koukl

Here’s another variation in the tactical game plan. You can use the first two questions, "What do you mean by that?” and “How did you come to that conclusion?" to stay out of the “hot seat.” The hot seat is when you're in persuasion mode rather than questioning mode, and the other person is responding with challenges that you don't know how to deal with.

One of the goals of the tactical game plan is to keep you in the driver's seat. Even though you're not doing most of the talking, you are still guiding the conversation using questions. When you're in the hot seat, however, the other person is in the driver’s seat. We can change that very quickly.

I want you to think about switching immediately from persuasion mode to student mode. You're going to stop trying to persuade the person. They have challenges you can't deal with. Instead, you are going to turn it around by being a student of their view. Here's how it will sound:

"Wow, you have a lot of objections I don't know how to deal with."

"You know a lot more about this topic than I do. Can you slow down a little bit? Let me take some notes."

“Tell me clearly what your view is and your specific reasons that you hold that view.”

Notice, those are the first two questions of the game plan: What do you mean by that? How did you come to that conclusion? You’re just applying them in a different way.

When you ask these questions, who is now in the driver's seat of the conversation? You are. You are now directing where you want it to go.

After they explain their view, you say, "Now let me think about it." Those are the magic words. Do you have any further obligation to answer the challenges? No, you've already admitted that you can't answer. You want to get an education so that you can consider it. This gives you a tremendous amount of freedom and latitude when you're in the hot seat.

What do you do next? You do what you say you're going to do. You think about it at your leisure when the pressure is off. This is where you can get ready to respond to the issue next time. That is a simple way, using your tactical game plan, to get out of the hot seat.