The Proverbs 1-31 Woman

Our sermon text this morning comes mainly from Proverbs 31. Verses 1-3 and 10-31. You can find that on page 654 in the pew Bible. There are also 3 other verses from earlier in Proverbs. Those are printed on the first page of the hymn insert. We’ll begin with those and then I’ll read from chapter 31.

By the way, Proverbs 31 is the last chapter of Proverbs. But we have 2 more thematic sermons, so we will conclude our series in two weeks… on June 23.

Before I read, let me note that in Proverbs 31, we’re told that these are the words of King Lemuel. They are an oracle taught to him by his mother. Similar to Agur from last week, we don’t know anything about King Lemuel other than his name, nonetheless, this is God’s very Word.

Reading of Proverbs 12:4, 18:22, 19:14, 31:1-3, 10-31.

It was the middle of the night in the spring of 1523 in northern Germany. 9 nuns lay awake. You see, they were waiting to escape the convent.

And then it happened. A horse drawn carriage pulled up to the main gate and was let in. The driver was there, allegedly, to pick up empty fish barrels, from the prior day’s Easter celebration. But he had more important cargo to take away. He cracked his horse whip. That was the signal. The nuns tiptoed quietly from their beds into the hallway, then through the shadows of the night, hid themselves in the cart, some even allegedly hiding in empty barrels.

The nuns gave the all clear signal and were soon free at last.

It was a bumpy ride, but they made it to their destination. Wittenburg, Germany and the home of Martin Luther. You see, Luther had helped orchestrate the convent escape. And within a matter of weeks, Luther had these young former nuns matched with young men in the town.

But there was a problem. One stubborn nun, named Katherine Von Bora, would have none of it. No, she would not be set up with the guy that Luther picked. She had other plans. And she made those plans known. It was Luther himself, she wanted.

Well, they were soon married. Former nun, former monk, and quite the couple.

Luther would write, “God gave me Katy, I would not trade her for Venice and all the kingdoms of France … I love her so dearly.” His nick names for her included “my rib” of course, referring to Eve being created from the rib of Adam. He also called her “doctor” because she cared for him. And also “queen of the pig farm” because she owned and managed a nearby pig farm.

Katy loved the Lord. She managed the house and finances. She brewed beer for Luther and his many guests. She would rise at 4am and work until 9pm overseeing all matters of the household. Luther called Katy, “the morning star of Wittenberg.”

They were very affectionate with one another. She honored and loved him, and he honored and loved her.

Katy embodied the Proverbs 31 description.

Now, if you are a woman and you and are feeling like “I’ll never be a Katy Luther.” Well, I do want take that heavy burden off of you. Because, while the Proverbs 31 woman is indeed a model, there’s so much more here. My goal is that all of us would see her heart and purpose… and all of us, would pursue her ways from a similar heart and purpose.

To get there, we’ll consider three things.

· First, the important question – to whom does this chapter apply?

· Second, we’ll consider the qualities of this virtuous wife.

· And third, we’ll conclude with Christ and the church. That’s the relationship to which this ultimately points.

#1 To whom does this apply?

And again, if you are feeling overly burdened by these verses, I want to try and both relieve that burden but also inspire you. First, notice in verse 10 that the section begins with the question, “an excellent wife, who can find?” It’s a recognition up front that the woman described is a rare jewel. It is not saying that if you don’t measure up, then you’re failing. Rather, it’s a picture of a beautiful, Godly woman. One that you can, yes, seek to emulate – but not in your own strength. No - the most important description is in verse 30. “a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

Everything else comes out of her reverent fear and worship of the Lord God. Her heart, which loves and honors God, is what motivates and enables her in her wisdom and work. So, instead of feeling the moralistic weight of this unattainable standard, recognize that this can never be achieved in your own strength. No, rather, it is the Godly fear of the Lord that enables this.

And another thing, the woman described has many resources to help her - servants, family finances, other things that enable her to produce clothing and plant vineyards. Also, her husband is an elder of the land. He’s esteemed and wise. What I am saying is that her situation is likely very different from your situation.

Furthermore, not every woman is called to be married, nor is every man. The apostle Paul was single and encouraged those who are single. But even if you are not married, you still have a household to manage and steward – and therefore, these pursuits in the Lord are for you as well.

So that is one thing.

But also, this chapter is not just written to women. In fact, it is actually written to young men.

For the younger guys here, I want you to see this. Remember, this is an oracle which King Lemuel received from his mother. Why would his mother pass along this word to Lemuel? Well, because she knows the heart of young men. Ok, there are many of you young men here. Teenage boys and twenty-something single guys. Look with me at verses 2 and 3. “What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings.” In other words, do not be seduced by charm and external beauty and therefore blind to true matters of beauty. That’s exactly what verse 30 says. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain” It’s talking about external beauty. Instead, what is the most important quality in a wife? A reverent fear of the Lord – that’s what it says.

Young men, are you hearing this? Do not let your feelings deceive you. By the way, young women, this is for you, too. Charm and seductive dress and looks will attract the wrong guy. He will not be an elder in the land. To be sure, I am not saying that attraction is not important. But it is secondary to a heart that loves the Lord and pursues him. SO, young men and women, ingrain this in your hearts and minds now, before you “fall in love.”

Ok, there’s one more category of people to whom this chapter is written. And that is, all of us… men, women, and children. I will argue, later, that this chapter is a picture of the relationship that we, as God’s people, have with Christ. The Scriptures are full of the language of God’s people being betrothed to God. In the New Testament, Christ is the bridegroom and the church is the bride. But even in the Old Testament, as we read earlier, God’s people are described as the unfaithful wife, whom the Lord loves and forgives and redeems. What I am saying is that even though the description is of a virtuous wife, this is also a description of us, God’s people. We are to honor the Lord in our calling as the bride of Christ. So, in other words, do not tune this chapter out if you are young or old, or married or single – this is for all of us. We’ll come back to that.

#2 The Virtuous Wife

But before we do, let’s consider this beautiful description

The woman described here is often referred to as The Proverbs 31 Woman - for good reason, of course. But I want to tweak that. Really, the description here is a bride who embodies all of Proverbs. So, I think it is better to call her the Proverbs 1-31 woman.

Think back over these last 9 months. We have seen a contrast, over and over, between the way of wisdom and righteousness versus the way of foolishness and wickedness. And the virtuous wife described here fulfills the categories of wisdom and righteousness. Almost every single positive category in Proverbs is modelled by this women.

Let me list them:

· She is trustworthy – verse 11, her husband trusts in her. She has a heart of integrity and honesty. She is praised at the gates, verse 31.

· Her words are kind, and she teaches kindness (verse 26) because her words bring life and not death – remember those Proverbs verses? She speaks what is true and builds up. Verse 12 – she does not harm her husband. Meaning, she does not speak ill of him behind his back.

· She is also generous to the poor - verse 20. She manages the finances and resources of the family with wisdom. She’s a good steward of all that is entrusted to her.

· Let me pause here and remind you again. This is for all of us. In other words, don’t tune out.

· Discipline and diligence describe her. Verse 17 – she dresses herself with strength. Similarly verse 25, strength and dignity are her clothing. And wow is she disciplined, rising early. Taking care of many things.

· Related to that, she is industrious. That is exemplified, really, all through these verses. Verse 27 – she does not eat the bread of idleness.

· She’s the opposite of self-centeredness and pridefulness – She cares for her household, providing clothing and food. They need not fear cold or hunger.

· And last, wisdom and knowledge describe her! That is explicit right there in verse 26. She’s been given discernment. She considers a field and buys it, verse 16. And verse 18, she perceives the value of her merchandise.

That’s quite the list. And of course, as I already mentioned, underlying all of this is her fear of the Lord. Actually, the fear of the Lord is going to be our concluding sermon in two weeks. It is the theme that has come up over and over and over. It is seeing and knowing the eternal God of the universe – whose judgement is just and whose ways are pure. Underlying this entire description is her reverent worship of the one true God. She considers his nature and truth and righteousness above all others.

What an amazing picture of the Proverbs applied to life. A picture for us to see and seek and emulate, especially in marriage.

In fact, this chapter is meant to be a model. Verses 10-31 are in the form of an acrostic. That means that every verse begins with a different letter of the Hebrew alphabet, in order. Verse 10 starts with Aleph which is the first letter of the alphabet. And verse 31 starts with the last letter in the Hebrew alphabet, Tav. 22 verses and 22 letters. It shows us that this description is a pattern. It’s not just one example of how wisdom can be applied. No, it is the ideal model for marriage.

It models of what God has ordained for marriage on earth.

Eve was created in the garden as a “help-meet” for Adam, as the Hebrew words puts it. Together they complement one another as they seek to fulfill what God has called them to do. That call in Genesis 1:29 is for them to be fruitful and multiple and fill the earth and subdue the earth and have dominion over the earth. Sometimes we call that the cultural mandate. It is for all of us, but part of it is for married couples, who work together but with different roles.

Back in Proverbs 31, notice verse 11 - the husband’s trust in his wife yields him “gain,” it says. Her work is his gain. That indicates the responsibility given to the husband. But what’s very clear is how the wife oversees matters of the household. That word “household” is used several times here. She works to care for those whom the Lord has entrusted to her care – including caring for her husband. It is a very full and rich description of that responsibility worked out. In other words, this chapter beautifully displays the sphere to which Eve is called.

Now, some in the church (a minority) believe that submission means the husband makes all the decisions and the wife should never work outside the home. That is not how Proverbs 31 describes her responsibilities. No, she clearly is making decisions and is applying the wisdom that God has given her in matters within her domain.

· She considers the value of a field and buys it and oversees it.

· She works both in the home and outside the home. She provides for her household… but also verses 18 and 24 – she makes garments and sashes and sells them in the market.

Here is what I am saying: Proverbs 31 a beautiful model of what God has ordered for marriage. Husbands and wives are equal in dignity and status before God. They are both created in his image. But each is given roles and responsibility that support and work together to accomplish God’s mandate… the mandate to fill and subdue the earth. And again, we are talking about the domain of the home and marriage.

Let me put it this way: Proverbs 31 helps us not to fall off the rails on one side or another. It helps a husband see his role not as authoritarian or dictatorial. Rather it demonstrates entrusting his household to his wife’s care, enabling her to fulfill that responsibility with dignity and wisdom. It also reveals that there are unique areas of responsibilities to which a husband and wife are each called.

Now, obviously this is a much larger conversation. There are several New Testament verses that further clarify and direct us. I would be glad to talk more.

#3 Christ and the church

But moving on, I mentioned that this chapter applies to all of us. What I mean is that the model of the excellent wife is a model we are all called to emulate. The reason I can say that is because this chapter also typifies the relationship of Christ to the church. We, the church, are his bride, called to fulfill all these things.

And let me work this out by showing you another structural element. Besides an acrostic, verses 10-31 are in the form of a chiasm. We occasional come across this. As a reminder, a chiasm is a form of parallel which we find both in Hebrew and Greek. The parallel ideas work from the outside into the center.

Here, we see both themes and words that draw us to the center of this text.

To begin, both verses 10 and 29 use the word excellent to describe the wife. That’s the outer parallel. In 11 and 28 - moving one verse in on both sides - Her husband trusts her and praises her. That’s the second level. If you go in one more level – she provides for her household. That is in verses 12-15 and also down in verse 27. Do you see how it’s working it’s way in from both sides? Wisdom is next, and then strength and dignity after that. Let’s move closer to the middle. Look down at verses 22 and 24. In 22, she makes bed coverings, and in verse 24, she makes linen garments. See that parallel? And at the very center is verse 23. By the way, the center reveals the main emphasis in this kind of parallel.

Verse 23 is the center. Let me read it. “Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.”

You see, the respect and honor that her husband receives comes, in part, through his wife. Her virtue in overseeing his household makes him known and brings him greater honor.

Her faithfulness increases his influence in the community. His wisdom is lifted up as she acts in wisdom and righteousness.

Beloved, this is the relationship that we, the church, have with Christ. As we oversee the household of faith with diligence and integrity and care of one another and generosity to the poor and in wisdom and righteousness. When we do all those things, Jesus is exalted.

He is made known and honored at the gates of the city. The world will see him more clearly, when we, his bride, are faithful to the call that he has given us… that is, when we seek to live and acts in all the ways that Proverbs has taught us. We are the Proverbs 1-31 woman - the bride of Christ.

Our strength comes from him. We’re honored because of his honor. And just like the Proverbs 31 husband, Christ, as our redeemer, enables and empowers us to live out that calling to which he has called us.

Do you see the parallels?

Christ is the husband, here, the bridegroom. He has redeemed and forgiven and restored us from our unfaithfulness to be his faithful bride. … more on that when we get to the Lord’s Supper. And to be sure, that does not take away how this applies to husbands and wives. No, these words are for marriages here and now… but the heart of these verses is the union between Christ and his church.

Let me try summarize it this way: When Proverbs 31 is lived out in the relationship between a husband and a wife then (1) the husband is honored and his wisdom known, (2) the wife is built up and praised by him for her faithfulness and work, and (3) their household receives the rich blessing of their marriage.

And similarly, when Proverbs 31 is lived out in the relationship between Christ and the church then (1) Christ is honored and his wisdom known, (2) the church is built up and praised by him for her faithfulness and work, and (3) the household of faith receives the rich blessing of the marriage between Christ and the church.

Proverbs 31 is a beautiful testimony for marriages but especially our spiritual marriage with the Lord.

Conclusion

Going back to the Luthers - Even considering their failures and sins, and let me say, there were many, Martin and Katy’s marriage modeled a Proverbs 31 marriage. Her care over his household was a tremendously rich blessing to thousands of people. Luther was known among the elders of the land, due in no small part to her wisdom, diligence, hospitality, and labors. Some have said that their marriage transformed the institution of marriage. I think its better to say, their marriage restored the institution of marriage to the model found in the Word.

Briefly, in closing, I had always wondered why these verses closed out the book of Proverbs. But now, I think I know why. These verses are for all of us and they direct us to Christ. They bring together all the wisdom of Proverbs.

May we emulate this wife, through our reverent fear of the Lord, because we are the bride of Christ.