Setting and Overview
Peace is one of the most important biblical ideas – from shalom in the Old Testament, to “grace and peace to you” in the New Testament. In fact, we may say that the having peace and creating peace are two of the defining characteristics of being Christian, especially from reading Matthew 5:9, John 14:27 and 16:33, Philippians 4:7, and II Thessalonians 3:16, among others. A statement like that in Matthew 10:34 may seem to come out of nowhere then, and we may struggle to process how it can be true if the other verses are true as well. In order to resolve the seeming tension, we may choose to ignore one side or the other, but that would be a mistake. If we trust that all of Scripture is true, then understanding any of it fully, can only be done in the context of all of it.

Exposition
When Jesus begins verse 34 with “do not think,” we receive a clue that he is challenging erroneous assumptions that people were making, in this case that the Messiah would immediately bring a time of political peace and material prosperity. He may bring spiritual peace, but certainly not social tranquility. Rather, he brings remarkable degrees of division. This division is predicted with a quote from Micah 7:6. There, the people turned against Micah and the prophets with their call to repentance, even to the point of turning on their own family to protect their sin. Similarly, people will reject Jesus so strongly that they will turn on even their own family who are followers. This means that his followers must be fully committed to him over all else, as we will see spelled out in the next verses.
Taken alone, Jesus’ statement in 10:37 to not love our family more than him seems relatively uncontroversial, but reading it in light of Luke 14:26, we see that something very challenging is intended. While Matthew 10:37 helps guard us against misunderstanding his use of “hate” in Luke, Luke guards us against the idea that Matthew 10:37 is allowing us to make Jesus #1 and our family #1A. In fact the language brings to mind Deuteronomy 33:9 and Exodus 32:25-29, where we see a very vivid picture of what it means to choose God over family. “Taking up our cross” may be even more challenging. While his original listeners would not have yest understood this reference in light of his crucifixion, they would already understand that it meant taking a one way trip to a horrific death, from which there was no escape. Such a horror may seek one to want to “find” our lives, Jesus makes clear that to try to do so in order to avoid the earthly sacrifices that might be commanded of us means to reject the eternal blessing of salvation. In light of that strong warning, verses 40-42 then provide us with some comfort. They give an exhortation to all followers to support the work of those carrying the Gospel message forth, but they also give assurance to those carrying the message, even if their role seems less important than that of the great missionaries, that even if many reject them, there are still some out there ready to support them with acts great and small.

Examination and Application
It may be tempting to avoid or move quickly past Jesus’ strong words of warning here, which is exactly how they are expressed. There are implied exhortations throughout, but only given as promises (vv. 40-42) and warnings (vv. 34-39.) These warnings may make us uncomfortable, but they should not be a surprise. If Jesus was worthy of leaving our friends, but not our careers, or our careers but not our families, or our families but not our lives, then our lives in him would not be nearly as glorious as what he promises. If the Gospel is true, however, and we are being offered eternal life and fullness in him, and if that is as glorious as he promises it to be, then we see how there is no room for anything else to compete with him. He tells us to be willing to lose everything in our lives because of him, and he is indeed worthy of such a commitment.