Thanks for joining us for a weekly message from DuBois Light & Life Church. Today you will hear encouraging words, worship, and a message. Our goal is that you would find Hope, Healing, and Purpose in Jesus Christ.

Live from DuBois Light and Life Church.

128 S 8th Street,

DuBois PA 15801

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5 ‘Suggested’ Friendship Guardrails:

When it dawns on your that your core group isn't moving in the direction you want your life to be moving in, your conscious should light up when you realize that your friends are not working toward the same eternal goals or the life that you are working towards. When that dawns on you, you should be concerned. Sometimes it does dawn on us that they do not want what we want from life but we excuse it anyway. It should concern you enough that you do something about it and not wait until there is a problem. If you are unwillling to leave the unhealthy group you are in right now, at the very least, find yourself and additional group of people who ARE moving in the right direction. If you realize that you do not have a 'safe' group that should also concern you.

When you catch yourself pretneding to be someone other than you really are. When I'm with them I try really hard to fit in, ignore certain values, morals, and beliefs. Your concious should light up anytime you move away from who you really are. Some of us are like that on Sunday's, but we reveal our true colors Sunday afternoon through Saturday night.

It takes a lot of work to pretend doesn't it? It also takes a lot of work to grow spiritually and be godly but it takes way more effort to pretend to be spiritual and 'godly'. Your heavenly Father knows the real you.

13 Evil people and PRETENDERS will go from bad to worse. They will fool others, and others will fool them.

14 But I want YOU to CONTINUE TO FOLLOW WHAT YOU HAVE LEARNED AND ARE SURE ABOUT. YOU KNOW THE PEOPLE YOU LEARNED IT FROM.

2 Timothy 3 : 13 – 14

What are you doing when you are willing to pretend to just fit in? You are feeding an insecurity in your heart. In your attempt to feel better about yoursel, you are pretending to be someone you are not. It should be a guardrail that causes us to pull back and be curious as to why am I willing to lower my standards and ignore my convictions to the point that I even compromise my personality for them.

When you feel pressure to compromise your conscious should ight up when you realzie that what has never been a temptation before suddenly becomes an option. Not when you do the behavior. Your guardrail needs to be when you consider it. When it comes to any behavior/choice/decision, slow down your reaction time, pay attention to that still small voice, and learn not to ignore it.

“Obviously, I’m NOT trying to win the APPROVAL OF PEOPLE, but of God. IF pleasing people WERE my goal, I WOULD NOT BE CHRIST’S SERVANT.”

Galatians 1 : 10

The conversation that we have with ourselves is usally one that talks ourselves into the behavior we already know is wrong and talk ourselves out of what we know is right, true, and godly. Then we begin to withdraw from the group of people we used to agree with. That alone should cause us to be curious about why. Why would I be willing to walk away from people who had my 'best interest' in mind. Why would I exchange that for another person or group who doesn't care where I end up, but will accept me as long as I participate with them.

When you hear yourself saying, 'I'll go, but I won't participate", your conscious should light up when you begin to think you can be in satan's pont and not fall for his bait. If you don't participate, they will reject you. If you go, you will have to partcipate. So just don't go.

“GUIDE ME AWAY FROM TEMPTATION and DOING EVIL. SAVE ME FROM SINFUL HABITS and FROM KEEPING COMPANY WITH those who are experts in evil. HELP ME NOT TO SHARE IN THEIR SIN IN ANY WAY!”

Psalms 141 : 4

What you’re saying is – "I'll just be in the proximity of fools, but I'll stay safe by not doing what they do."

Solomon's warning is that it's not necessarly that you do what they do, but you are there when they do it. It's about staying away from anyone who knows the difference between right and wrong but doesn't care. Solomon might say maybe you ARE wise enough to not participate, but you never know when they'll get busted and you're involved just by in the proximity of them when you hear yourself saying I'll go, but I won't participate... that should be a guardrail. You need to stop and reconsider.

When you hope the people you care about most don't find out where you have been or who you have been with, your conscious should light up when you realize that you're hiding things and friends from the people you love most. It is your sign that your gaurdrail to stay away from that person or that pace. If you have to create a defence in your mind about people and places, that should bother you so much that you take a giant step back.

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This series that creates a lot of tension can move and motivate you to make some wise decisions. Once you have faced and experienced the consequence of being around wrong people in the wrong place at the wrong time then you would be willing to go back and risk all kinds of embarrassment. You would be willing to do anything to keep you from all the suffering and pain and regrets.

Don't misunderstand what we are saying about friends and unbelivers. The body of Christ was created and this building (church) was built for those who are lost and far from God. However, never confuse compassion with wisdom. When you use compassion/love as an excuse to remain in unhealthy relationships/places, you are lying to yourself. There is a lot of misguided compassion in our culture today. Don't blur the lines of compassion and wisdom. They go together and flow together.

“The BEST thing that you can do for a person you LOVE and for the friends that you have COMPASSION for, is to STAY ON ‘THIS SIDE’ OF THE GUARDRAIL, so that when they ‘crash’, YOU’RE HEALTHY ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY HELP THEM.” - Andy Stanley

You might say it's not compassionate to end an unhealthy relationship, but when people crash, who do they run to? Typically those who kept their guardrails in place. They run to those people because they are healthy. Drawing back a relationship or a group may be the most compassionate thing you do or express for that person/group.

Here is what we need to face up to whether it is hard, uncomfortable, or seemingly uncompassionate...

“WALK WITH the WISE and BECOME WISE, for a COMPANION OF FOOLS SUFFERS HARM.”

Proverbs 13 : 20