Marriage doesn’t have to feel heavy or complicated, sometimes we just need a gentle nudge to see where we’ve let things slide. In this conversation with Arlene Pellicane, author of Making Marriage Easier, Karen and Emily unpack the four practical shifts that can strengthen your relationship: play by the rules, speak kindly and listen well, practice gratitude, and take fun seriously. Whether you’re in the trenches with little ones or looking ahead to the golden years, this episode will encourage you to invest in your marriage today!

Episode Recap:

Arlene’s background and marriage (5:43)

Ask yourself, what can I do to make my marriage easier? (7:59)

What does it mean to “play by the rules” in marriage? (9:47)

Divorce is highly predictable based on how couples speak to one another (11:05)

How does giving thanks make marriage easier? (14:37)

The source of our happiness is God, nothing else (17:36)

Our phones are essentially a third person in modern marriages (18:15)

Don’t forget to have FUN together! (21:57)

In marriage, you will reap what you sow (26:21)

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 (NIV) “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Discussion Questions:

1. What is one small step you could take this week to “make marriage easier”?

2. How do you and your spouse communicate? Do you notice more admiration or criticism in your words?

3. When was the last time you laughed/just had fun with your spouse? How could you plan something simple and enjoyable together soon?

4. In what ways can practicing gratitude shift your perspective in marriage?

5. How has phone or screen usage affected your relationship? What boundary might help protect your connection?

6. What was most encouraging to you about this conversation?

Resources:

- Snag Arlene’s book, Making Marriage Easier on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3KbFMD3

- Grab easy date night ideas (scroll down) at MakingMarriageEasier.com

- Check out our Parenting Together curriculum for FREE in the BOAW Moms app: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927

- Download the companion study guide in the BOAW store: boaw.mom/parentingtogether