“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 8:4, ESV)

As you’ve probably seen already, the Song of Solomon is beautiful, but it is also sensual and explicit. It is clear that the married couple is talking about their lovemaking. God created our bodies along with their drives and called it “good”. But He designed this for the marriage relationship only—to be enjoyed by husband and wife.

Sexual passion has been compared to fire. A fire in the fireplace warms the house and is a delight. But if you take it out of the fireplace and spread it around the living room, then it can burn the house down! Likewise, sex within the confines and protection of marriage is good. It warms the heart and is a delight. It helps two different people become one flesh. It is also God’s design for procreation.

But if you remove sex from this context, then it becomes immoral, dangerous and often leads to unwanted pregnancies. God intended children to be raised by a mother and father who are committed to each other and who will be around until the child reaches adulthood. But when a woman becomes pregnant, and the father is either uncommitted or immature, then the child is disadvantaged, and the mother carries a much greater burden.

Therefore, the Shulamite calls out to the virgin daughters of Jerusalem, “Do not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” Until it pleases whom? God, the couple, family and friends. When it is right, then it pleases everyone, but when it is wrong, then it brings shame and sorrow.

In this hyper-sexualized culture, we have a most challenging task to keep young people pure until marriage. May God help us teach them the valuable lesson of keeping the fire in the fireplace!