Dating 101

Song of Solomon 2

More and more of the couples that I do pre-marriage counseling with met - ONLINE.

I was single at the very beginning of the information revolution. Online dating was in its very, very early stage. It wasn’t long after I got online… with the old dial up modem, and when AOL was still a thing. I remember my first and only online relationship - it was a girl in TX. She was a good christian girl… pretty attractive… and she mailed me cookies….I thought it had real potential… until I discovered she was coco for coco-puffs. Today there is - SILVER SINGLES. So not matter you age or stage in life online dating is thing.

So if you are into the online dating scene… let me give you a little advice.

ONLINE DATING HEAD’S UP:

If a woman says she’s 40ish, that means she 39 1/2. If a man says he is 40ish that means he is 52 and looking for a 25 year old.

If a guy says he’s huggable, that means he’s carrying a few extra lbs and has more body hair than sasquash.

If a woman says she’s romantic that means she looks better by candle light.

If a guy says he’s laid back, that means he lives in his parent's basement and doesn’t have a job.

If a girl says she is bubbly and fun that means - she NEVER shuts up.

If a lady says she is an independent woman, that means she has control issues. She will be your boss and make you like it.

If a guy says he is average looking that means he fell from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

INTRODUCTION: Modernity likes to pretend.

No longer does the literature professor ask, “What does this novel mean?” Today the question is, “what does this novel mean to you?”.

The concept that two + two = four is up for debate.

Even your gender is presented as a matter of personal preference and expression.

But roads are old-fashioned. Imagine approaching a road with the same rules we apply to so many other things in this modern world:

The road has curves, it winds through the forrest. But suppose we say, “I like to think of this road as straight”.

The road has a posted speed limit of 25MPH. But suppose we say, “I like to see this road as having no limit to my speed”.

You see, the Road was not built by Millennials. The road doesn’t care what your opinion is. It was laid in asphalt. It is inflexible, it is mean, it is old fashion.

Therefore, it is incumbent upon you, the driver, to accommodate the road, it will NOT accommodate you. You must break when it says break and you must accelerate when it says accelerate. It helps you - it provides guardrails, to keep you out of the ditch. But it will not do the driving for you.

Romance is in many ways like a road. It’s old fashion, it’s mean, sometimes brutal, it will help you, it will warn you, but it will not accommodate you. And if you do not honor its posted warnings and take responsibility as the driver - you will find yourself in a ditch.

Perhaps some of you here today, or those watching online are in the ditch of romance. We all have been there. As a matter of fact, on this road, broken hearts cover the grass like litter.

Some have even opted for the exit ramp and got off the road of romance altogether.

You’ve seen them - they are roommates, but not lovers. They coexist, but no longer communicate. They eat together, but they no longer dine. In some ways they died 15 years ago, they just haven’t notified the funeral home yet.

May it not be so among you. See your marriage points to something far bigger than your marriage. It points to the relationship between Jesus Christ and his redeemed people, those who are collectively called, “His bride”.

So for you - a dead, stale relationship is not an option. You are called to something greater, you are called to PROCEED, but please, proceed with caution.