Focus on them before you focus on what you want to tell them.
Francis Schaeffer once said, "If I have only an hour with someone, I will spend the first fifty-five minutes asking questions and finding out what is troubling their heart and their mind, and then the last five minutes I will share something of the truth."
A lot of us might think that if we give our Muslim neighbor or our friend who identifies as gay fifty-five minutes out of the hour to share about themselves, we will squander our opportunity to make a difference.
But by taking the time to find out what's going on deep inside their soul, what we share in those last five minutes will be precisely what they need to hear. That's because we first took the time to focus on them before we focused on what we wanted to tell them.
Focus on the Person Rather Than the Argument
Alan Shlemon
Arguments Don't Have to Be Argumentative
Alan Shlemon
Arguments don't have to be argumentative. An argument is composed of two things: 1. Your point of view 2. Evidence or reason to back up your view We make arguments all the time about everyday cases we want to make—what we want to eat, or what couch to buy—and usually, we're not being argumentative when we make them. We're just explaining our view and giving a reason for it. Arguments about morality and religion should be exactly the same. We can make a case for our moral or religious convictions by stating our view and providing evidence for it, and we don't have to be aggressive, harsh, or mean about it. That way, we come across as winsome and gracious ambassadors for Christ.
Don't Be Confused by the Two Definitions of Science
Alan Shlemon
Don't be confused by the two definitions of science: 1. Science is a methodology: observation, experiments, testing, and discovering facts about the natural world. 2. Science is the philosophy of naturalism: The idea that nature is all there is. The second definition is controversial because it allows the person defining it that way to disqualify Christian beliefs as unscientific, since our faith accepts the reality of an immaterial world. So, whenever you come across the word “science,” be aware that they could be smuggling in the definition of naturalism to gain an unfair advantage in their case against your faith.
Focus on the Gospel, Not on Apologetic Arguments
Alan Shlemon
Focus on the gospel, not on apologetic arguments. Sometimes we're so eager to try out our arguments that we initiate discussions about an apologetic subject as if that's the most important thing to discuss. It's not. If you have the opportunity to bring up the gospel, that matters more than any other subject. If they reject the gospel for some reason, then you can use your apologetics to address their concern. Remember, apologetics is not an end in itself. The end is the gospel, and apologetics is simply a means to that end. Apologetics can help you remove obstacles that keep people from accepting Christ. So, if you're in a conversation, and you can lead the discussion in any direction, lead them to understand what Christ has done for them.