Recipe for Healthy Communication - Pastor Mel

Life Changing Faith - Book of James

Bottom Line: Healthy communication strategies are essential in building healthy relationships. The Word of God gives us a plan by which we can relate in a godly way to one another and avoid a great deal of relational hurt.

Intro: The World's "Way" of Communicating:

1. Be easily offended by the slightest wrong committed against you.

2. Become angry and outraged.

3. Move from addressing the problem to attacking the person.

4. Resort to full name calling and negative labeling.

5. Speak over the other person, cutting that person off at every turn.

6. Ruin the reputation of the person that disagrees with you. (canceling.)

A. Believers should communicate in godly ways... no exceptions! James 1:19

B. A basic essential strategy for godly communication consists of three parts. Jam 1:19-21

Three basic perts of godly communication:

1. Quick to Listen

2. Slow to Speak

3. Slow to Anger

Closer Look: Quick to Listen/Slow to Speak. v. 19

a. "both ways" strategy...both individuals committed to listening.

b. Implies a desire to understand...and identify with the other person.

c. It conveys a commitment to truly understand the problem before rushing to a solution.

Slow to Anger. v19-20; Eph. 4:26;31

Where does our anger come from?

1. Past Hurts

-Heated Situations can remind us of past hurts

- We can lash out to prevent future hurt

-We can learn the wrong lessons from past experiences

-We can grow up with anger and think it's normal.

2. World View: Our Belief Structure

Life: Supposed to be fair, but it's not

People: Out to get me

Self: I dislike myself and will take it out on you

God: God is ignoring me and my problems and my life seems like it's out of control.

Now what: Identify anger detonators and pray that God will give you the strength to remove them.