How the Church has Lost Her Passion for God

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How the Church has Lost Her Passion for God

September 21, 2023

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What happens when a church culture loses a love for God Himself and replaces it with a focus on other things? Find out in this conversation between Nate Danser and Steve Gallagher. (from Purity for Life Episode #501 - Babylon: An Apathetic Church Culture)

Nate: Okay. So, Pastor Steve, you have said that a culture of apathy in the church creates an environment where the standard of Christian living becomes very different from what is laid out in Scripture. So, people feel like as long as they do some basic, outward good things, they are good to go. But I wanted to talk to you in this segment about what you experienced back in the 1970’s, because that was a time of revival when the church was very strong, healthy and passionate.

You've mentioned at different times that the atmosphere in the church today is very different than it was then. I want to talk a little bit about some of the differences and how you've seen that affect people's lives. One of the things you've said is that people were very passionate about the things of God. What was it like to have a church culture where the general atmosphere was filled with a passion for God.

Steve: Well, I don't want to overstate it. The part of the church that I was involved in, which was the Pentecostal side of things, generally speaking, had a high level of passion. I don't know that it was true of the rest of the church because that's where my involvement was. And the Jesus movement came up out of Chuck Smith, David Wilkerson and Leonard Ravenhill. Those kinds of men are the ones the Lord used to really usher in the Jesus movement that I got saved into in 1970. So, there was such a difference in that movement as opposed to how things are now in the church.

Of course, a lot of it was that many of us were young and excited about the things of God. Especially those of us who were ex-drug addicts and came out of a lot of darkness. But I guess if I could just get it narrowed down to one thing that I can use as a comparison, back in those days I used to love Sunday night services because after the service was over, we would gather around the altar of the church and we would literally spend hours seeking the Lord. That was the norm. We would often have all night prayer times on Friday nights. We would pray for a couple hours and then go out witnessing to people. That was the kind of passion we had.

Fast forward all these years later and there's hardly any churches that even have Sunday night services. People are so uninterested. They are locked into things of the culture like television and the internet. They go to church on Sunday morning, but for the typical American Christian, there is not much passion for the things of God in their lives. There are people out there that still are really passionate for the Lord, but not at the level that there were in 1970.

Nate: Ok. So, you definitely have firsthand experience with the church then and the church now. And you have been watching decade after decade this passion declining. When you think about what contributed to that decline, are there things that really stand out to you as the big contributors?

Steve: What happened was when the Jesus movement swept through the church in the late sixties, early seventies, it brought a lot of youth who were excited about the things of God and that just created an overall enthusiasm. And out of that enthusiastic movement, Christianity became more popular in America. There was a real change. It went from being something that old people did to in the eighties when it became something that young people were involved in. So in the eighties, we saw a real change come over the evangelical movement. Mega churches started to proliferate across the country. Christian radio just really took off. There were shows that began then that are still going today and have held that level of success all these years.

So, what happened was success came into the church and it really became the thing to look acceptable to the culture. So, the aspects of success, the size and the focus became shifted from godliness to talent. And as that change happened, there was a great diminishment in the passion, because over time the culture of the world began to mix in with the church. And it's really gone downhill since then. So, in my opinion, that is why that fire went out from the 1970’s.

Nate: Yeah. So, it's like the fire was there because people were pressing into God Himself. But then when the focus shifts to something else, you start kind of moving away and you just lose the passion.

Steve: Yeah, it's just success. I mean, that's what happened. The church became successful, and the culture started noticing the church. And it wasn't all negative attention like what it's mostly become now. Now there is vitriol aimed at the church. Back then it wasn't that way.

Nate: One of the things that you just touched on was that when you make something other than the pursuit of God the focus, then there is going to be some kind of negative consequence. There's going to be some kind of diminishment in your spiritual life. And one thing that Patrick and I were talking about in preparation for this interview is how easy it is to pursue a cause because there are so many good ones out there. Like abortion, or justice, or the need to have godly schooling and training for your kids. In a really wicked age, there are a lot of good causes to promote and to fight for. But then there's just the dangers that can come with it when you make that the thing that you're going to focus your whole life on. What do you see as being one of the main negative consequences of doing that?

Steve: Well, some of the causes you mentioned were not really going on in the eighties. The main causes back then with Christian activists were against abortion, against pornography and against the homosexual agenda. And because I was in the midst of starting a ministry to men in sexual sin, those issues became big for me as well. And it wasn't until later that I really could look back and see things in hindsight. You see, what was happening was there was a shift in church culture. In the seventies there was a lot of repentance going on. There were people really seeing their need to repent of their sins and to walk circumspectly with God. Meaning they were being very aware of their own tendencies to veer off or to get carnal or worldly.

By the time of the eighties, the shift that I could see happening was that Christian activists like Don Wildman and Jerry Falwell were creating a movement within the church, and it was taking the church with it. They were focused on these causes and basically what it amounted to was seeing the faults in the culture and focusing on the faults out there rather than people looking at their own hearts. I think that was one of the main reasons why the American church left its passion for God and was kind of displaced in part by those kind of things.

Nate: Ok, briefly, could you talk about what the connection is between why starting to always look outward reduces the passion for God?

Steve: Let me answer that question by referring to the Sermon on the Mount. How did Jesus open it?

Blessed are the poor in spirit.

Blessed are those who mourn.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for

righteousness.

Those were the foundational pieces that should be in place as people come into the kingdom. But those same components are vital for someone to maintain their life in the kingdom. That requires you to have a tremendous awareness of your own need before God.

That is what it means to walk in repentance. And that was at some level very real in the seventies and into the eighties. But it started to change. And part of that change came from people looking at outward issues instead of looking inwardly at their own hearts. And I don't mean there should be morbid introspection and a total fixation on what's wrong with oneself. There is a healthy balance between having our eyes on God and on being aware of our own lack and our own need.

Nate: Ok. I have a thought pertaining to what you were talking about. You were saying that sometimes God sees something different in our inner life as we're fighting for these causes. We may be looking out and seeing all the problems in the world around us and God might see something going on in our hearts. That's basically what Jesus’s message to the church in Ephesus was all about in the Book of Revelation, because he saw their works and He said there was a lot of good there.

For instance, they were not bearing with those who are evil. They were exposing false apostles. They were patiently enduring. They were bearing up for the sake of His name and not growing weary. But he also said to them that they had abandoned the love that they had at first. He even went as far as to say, “If you don't go back to where you were, I'm going to take your lamp stand away.” Why is maintaining our first love so important to Jesus?

Steve: Well, the whole point of Christianity is to enter that relationship with God to where we love Him and have a love relationship with Him. Which is different from religion. The Christian religion says, “Okay. I have all these do’s and don'ts” or “I'm supposed to go to church. I'm supposed to not do these things or go to these places.” That's religion. But Christianity is a spiritual life.

It isn't just going to church. It is my spirit interacting with God's Spirit, and the connection between that interaction is love. It's my love for God that makes me want to interact with Him and makes me want to worship Him. And it's His love for me that wants to care for me and watch over my life and so on. That interaction between God and us is what it is all about. I know, for me personally, I started off with a passion for God, but it diminished over time and then it came back. I think that is pretty typical for someone on the right trajectory. They start off in that first love and then over time it kind of dissipates. But then it starts building up into a mature love.

And that's what I can say, 40 to 50 years later for myself is that my love for God is so much stronger than it was 20 to 30 years ago, even though I felt more passionate than I do today. But it has matured into something that's real and it controls how I think and act. My love for the Lord is why I don't allow myself to lust and do the things I used to do. I don't have to beat myself into not doing the wrong thing because I don't want to do something that displeases the Lord. There's just a change that has gone on inside me. I'm just using myself as an example, but that I think is part of what has been missing in the Church. A real sincere love for the Lord.

Timeless Truths: God Must Be First in Our Hearts and Lives

April 25, 2024

When we allow something to become more important to us than the Lord, it has become an idol. In this "Timeless Truths" segment from our archives, Jeff & Rose Colón talk to couples about making sure that the Lord is first in their hearts and lives. Host: Jeff and Rose Colón have joined us in the studio. It's good to see you again. Jeff & Rose: Good to see you. Host: Thank you for coming in and talking with us. We want to talk today about spousal idolatry. We use the term idolatry a lot in our everyday topics here at Pure Life. Could you kind of give our listeners an idea of what idolatry truly is? Jeff: Well, I've heard it said like this: An idol is something that we consistently make equal to or more important than God in our attention and desire. Maybe we just talk about it all the time. Or we're very devoted to it. Or we make choices that revolve around it. It's just something in our lives that has become more important to us than God. Host: So, it could be anything. It doesn't necessarily have to be something bad. Jeff: No. Absolutely. Host: So, how does someone know if he or she has made their spouse an idol in their heart? Jeff: Well, there's some telltale signs that people can see if they look inside themselves. They can ask themselves, “What is it that I really adore? What is it that I really put my hope in? What is it that I really look forward to? What is it that I really make sacrifices for in my life? What is the most prevalent topic that I tend to talk about? What do I look for my peace in? Where do I look for my meaning and my happiness? Am I looking to my spouse to make me happy? There are a lot of telltale signs that will show us if something is really an idol in our hearts. Host: Rose, when you're looking at the wife in a marriage, what are some of the ways as a counselor that you might see how a wife has made an idol of her husband? Rose: One of the ways that I've seen this manifest is when a wife is being consumed with her husband as far as what he's doing and what he's not doing. She is looking to see if he's spending time with the Lord or if he's not spending time with the Lord. She constantly wants to know if he's pressing into God the way he's supposed to be pressing into Him. Ultimately the focus for this wife is just the husband. She's made the husband out bigger than God is and because of that God is very small in her world. She's just consumed with her husband. An example I can give from my own life is when my husband was in his sin. I was consumed with how he was doing and what he was doing. I was consumed all day wondering if he was going to be acting out and because of that I wasn't focused on my own walk with the Lord or even my own responsibilities. So, what I've seen in my personal life and in counseling women is that when the husband becomes an all-consuming object, then it starts affecting a wife’s relationship with the Lord. But then too it affects how she acts and responds toward her husband. Host: So, you're not saying that a wife shouldn't care about her husband and that she should never think about her husband. It's really a matter of balance. Rose: Right. It is a matter of balance because it's okay to wonder how my husband is doing. But to be wondering how he is doing 24/7 to the point where you’re anxious and worried inside your heart, that's where you are crossing a line because you’re not trusting the Lord with your husband. Host: Jeff, when a husband or a wife has made an idol of their spouse, how do they begin to deal with that? If they've recognized it, then what are the steps they need to take to deal with it? Jeff: Well, first of all, they need to understand that from the Word of God,we're told that God will have no other gods before Him. He's a jealous God. He longs for the attention that we give to other things, because He desires to have a relationship with us and He wants us all to Himself. That should be our desire as well because He is what we ultimately need. He created us to have fellowship with Him and to be satisfied by Him and He knows that when we look to other things then we're not going to be fulfilled. He ultimately just wants to bless us and give us what we ultimately need. So, He encourages us in His Word to turn away from worthless things, to turn away from things that won't satisfy and to seek Him diligently and to make Him the all engrossing object of our lives. He doesn’t have a vain desire for us to fall at His feet, selfishly needing that worship. It’s because we were created by Him and for Him. We were created to have fellowship with Him and He wants that fellowship with us. So, it displeases Him when we look to other things. So, a husband or wife needs to understand that when they are idolizing their spouse, they are giving an amount of attention to someone else that only God should be receiving from them. And if the Lord is not first in their lives, then they're not going to be able to fulfill His purpose and plan for their lives. Host: Well, is it too strong of a statement to say that if this is the reality that a person is living in then they're in sin and they need to repent? Jeff: Absolutely. Because sin is missing the mark. And if God is not who we are focusing on then we're missing the mark. One of the main aspects of sin is going around God to get what we want. So, God must be at the center of the marriage. And if both spouses don't have Him as their first source or their first object of desire, they are going to be off track and they are not going to be in the will of God. Rose: Also, in 1 John, John tells us to keep ourselves from idols. And when you read that command in light of marriage you will see that there's something that you need to do to make sure that you are not allowing your spouse to become an idol in your heart. We need to always be checking our hearts to make sure that God is bigger than our spouse. He's able to keep our spouses. He's able to watch over our spouses. I don't have to be worrying 24/7 about what my husband is doing because our God is bigger than that. When we start worrying and fretting that just reveals that something is not right in our heart and it's usually the tendency of making our spouse an idol. Host: What are some of the practical things that either a couple can do together or the spouse can do in their own walk to overcome spousal idolatry? Jeff: Well, I know for myself that if I have something in my life that is taking my attention away from where it needs to be, I need to start making choices to get my focus where it needs to be. The Bible commands us to set our minds on the things above and not the things of the earth. And we just need to rein in our thoughts and our feelings, and we need to start going to the throne of grace which is where we'll get what we need. We need to start getting in the Word of God. We need to start seeking God more on a daily basis. The more time we start spending with God and the more time we start choosing to make Him the first thing that we're pursuing, He's going to automatically balance things out and then we're going to start seeing things right. And we're going to start to see our spouse in the right perspective. What spouses don't realize is that when God is first and when you're in a right relationship with Him, you're going to be able to fulfill your role as a husband or a wife the way God designed you to because things are going to be in their proper order. Host: Rose, how often have you seen in counseling where the spouse who has been in idolatry begins to let go of their idolatry and then a lot of issues and problems that were coming up in the marriage kind of begin to take care of themselves. Rose: Yeah. Those problems do begin to fall by the wayside because the focus is off the other spouse and they're focusing more on the Lord and what the Lord wants to be to them and that they were created for Him first and for His purposes. So, the focus really gets off of self or their spouse and it starts to get more on the Lord. And as that happens, you become freer, and you have more peace inside and you're able to be a blessing. Instead of looking to get something from the other person, you're just looking to give and be a blessing to them.

Timeless Truths: A Changed Heart will Bear Obvious Fruit

April 18, 2024

In this "Timeless Truths" segment from our archives, counselor Judy Lucas gives some guidance to a woman who wants to know if her fiancé has truly repented of sexual sin. Host: Judy, we want to tackle a question here from a woman that is considering marrying a man. He has confided in her letting her know that he spent five years addicted to pornography, but he does not currently have any desire to go back to sexual sin. He apparently has had some period of freedom. He did acknowledge to her that he only struggles with images when he brings them up in his mind. She wants to marry him, but she doesn't want to marry someone involved in pornography. How should she be looking at the situation? Judy: Well, one thing I would definitely tell her is that it’s a really good thing that she can thank the Lord for that he is willing to be honest and walk in the light about his past involvement in sexual sin and that he is honest about his current struggles. There are too many men on the other side of the fence where they are hiding and lying. So, it is a very good thing that he is willing to tell on himself. Another question that we hear all the time from women who are either dating or married to guys that have a past of viewing pornography is, “How do I know that he's not going to do this again?” And the honest truth is that it is hard to know. I can't give them full assurance that the man will never go back to his sin. There are many things we don't know about this relationship. How long have they been seeing each other? How long has she known him? What's been his track record? One thing I do want to encourage any woman to do when dating is to not be in a hurry to get married. Instead, she should begin to pay attention to his lifestyle a bit. What is some of the fruit he displays in his life? What do his daily activities look like? Does he seem to have a strong relationship with the Lord? Is he in the word? Is he in prayer? Does he spend time at church? Is he serving others in a selfless manner? Or is he in to things that would raise up red flags? I would even ask her about what her relationship with this guy looks like. Are they walking in purity, or is he making suggestions to cross lines into sexual intimacy? There are a lot of things to process and think about. The main thing she should be doing is praying and seeking the Lord for direction. She should maybe even be talking with her pastor to get some wise counsel along the way too. Host: We do need to add as an encouragement that God can keep a man that is truly repentant and who’s desire truly is to not to go back to his sin safe in His hand. Judy: Yes, He can. There's a lot of wonderful Scripture that talks about how the Lord will keep you. He gives us the Holy Spirit to bring the conviction that keeps us on the narrow way. The other thing is that when a guy looks at pornography, those images are imprinted in his brain and it's a continual battle for that man. So, I'm sure that the enemy does come to bring those images back to mind. But also, there is the reality of the power of God to transform the human mind. That transforming power comes slowly over time as he spends time in the Word. The Holy Spirit begins to renew the mind and wash out those images. He begins to replace those images with who God is and the things of God. It's like the washing out of the old junk and bringing something brand new and beautiful to think about. One last thing I would encourage this woman to do as she's thinking about marriage is to make sure her relationship with God is where it needs to be. She needs to make sure that God is her first love. He needs to be her heavenly husband. Her walk with God should be strong. It is also crucial that they are both walking with the Lord and making Him the first priority in their lives. Host: Yes. And that's so important particularly when looking at a suitor who has a background of sexual sin. Our prayer of course is that they will continue to walk in victory. But if something happens where he falls into sin or the enemy sets a trap that he steps into, a woman is going to need a solid relationship with the Lord to be able to respond to that appropriately in the marriage or the dating relationship. Judy: Absolutely. And again, that's why it's so important for him not to just be honest with her but to have another godly man in his life that can come alongside him and help him walk through his struggles with temptation. We always tell women that they are not to be the main accountability person for their spouse or someone they are dating. So, it is important for him to have a godly male figure that he can be open and honest with. Host: Yeah. Well, as a guy, I'll just second that and say we need that. So, I appreciate you underscoring the need for accountability as well. Thanks so much for your counsel on this issue. Judy: Thank you. It was great to be here.

Timeless Truths: There is Nothing More Christ-like Than Forgiveness

April 4, 2024

In this "Timeless Truths" segment from our archives, Kathy Gallagher talks about the beauty of forgiveness and mercy, and shows hurting wives how to be in that spirit toward their husbands. Host: Kathy, I know that you were thrilled to get this letter from Yolanda. She wants some information and help on how she can live the mercy life. Her problem is, how do you live the mercy life in a marriage where you've been hurt by your husband? Kathy: Yeah. First of all, Mike, I'd like to try and describe what the mercy life is as we know it here at Pure Life Ministries. The Mercy Life is a life where we put the needs of others above our own. It's a Biblical life. The Mercy life is a life where you are meeting the needs of other people. It’s a life where you see a need and you fill it and that can be applied in any situation in life. You could do some small thing to meet a need for someone that's struggling in your workplace. You can do an act of kindness for a neighbor. There's an endless list of ways that you can just simply meet a need. And because you love Jesus and because He lives in you, naturally you do kindnesses to other people. So, now let me paint how this mercy life can be lived out in a marriage where the husband is living in sexual sin. A lot of women are afraid to be too kind because understandably, they have their guard up. But I just want to encourage wives that living the mercy life toward your husband is the only way to live your life in a way that's pleasing to God. Host: Well, basically what you're saying Kathy is the mercy life is what Christianity is really supposed to be about. But you're not talking about just people doing good things for other people. There's nothing wrong with that, but it has to be motivated by something. What is it in us that produces the mercy life as we mature as Christians? Kathy: As time goes on, the love of Jesus takes over in us and we begin to see the needs around us and we want to meet those needs. I'll never forget a lady I met up in Vermont. She was an elderly woman and she was just such a tremendous blessing to me. And I don't even know why she said this to me, but she walked up to me and she wrapped her arms around me and she said, “The most God-like characteristic there is, is forgiveness.” That was many years ago and it really affected me. When she said it, I was trying to process through why she was saying that to me. And over the years it has become so real to me what she was saying. It was Jesus Himself speaking to me through her that forgiveness, mercy and love are the characteristics that are manifested in the life of a believer that shows we really belong to Jesus. You know you've been born from above when you love the brethren and mercy is flowing out of your life. As we mature as Christians, that's what comes out of us more and more. Host: I know as you're saying that women are going to be thinking to themselves, “Okay. So, I have to go be merciful and I have to generate forgiveness in my heart.” But we can't do that on our own. We have to have a revelation of something for that to take place. Kathy: Right. And I think that revelation comes when we come to terms with the mercy that's been given to us. When we understand and we really grasp the goodness of God toward us then it becomes much easier to forgive those who have offended us. But if it's not real to you in your spirit, how much debt has been forgiven you then it becomes very difficult to forgive the debt of another, even if it is your husband. Now, I understand it as well as any woman listening how much it hurts to be devastated by your husband's unfaithfulness and yet I know, and I knew at the time, what a sinner I was and how much God had forgiven me. So, with that knowledge, how could I not forgive Steve? And that revelation and resolve came to me from God. That didn’t come from Kathy Gallagher. It's not in me to be that way. And I think that it is a very big part of the process for a lot of women to really examine themselves when they get in a self-righteous spirit, and they don't want to forgive and they want to hold their husband's sin against them. What they need to do is just remember the debt that has been forgiven for themselves. Their husband's sin is not worse than their own. It's not that God forgave her a little bit and God needs to forgive him a whole bunch. We are all on equal footing. Host: And whether it's a spouse or someone else who sins against us, we have to recognize our own sinfulness. That is the beginning of living the mercy life. Are there some practical ways that a wife can help her husband in a situation like this. What are the needs of her husband who may be struggling with sexual sin? Kathy: Well, there's a lot of things a woman can do. Number one is that without becoming overbearing and demanding, she needs to come up with ways to come alongside her husband. For instance, she should offer for them to pray together. This should be the husband's role, but we have to deal with reality and a lot of guys that are struggling with sexual sin aren't even trying to facilitate times of prayer. So, she can offer to pray with him or they can study the word together, but he needs his wife to support him as he struggles through. That doesn't mean that you're putting your seal of approval on his sin, but you're there for him and you're believing with him and you're going to just throw yourself into this marriage as best you can while he works his way through it. And this is only possible if he's in a repentant spirit and has a repentant heart. A lot of men that women are married to are not in a repentant state of heart. So, everybody's got their own set of circumstances that they have to navigate through. And if he's not repentant, she can't be his cheerleader. So, I'm speaking to women whose husbands are really trying to work through the repentance process. She can really offer herself and be supportive. She can be not afraid to give of herself to her husband. He needs that. Host: Well, I'm glad you made that point because mercy does not always take the same form. Sometimes mercy requires that we rebuke someone. Kathy: Yea, mercy can be very severe at times. And there were many times when I had to pull the plug on Steve so to speak. I'll just mention here one of those times. I did not know that it was the Lord directing me at the time, but I kept sensing that I needed to separate myself from Steve. And that seemed like the weirdest thing to me because he was doing so well in my mind. Well, eventually I did and sure enough, I found out that the whole time I thought he was doing great, he was doing terrible. So, when I did the hard thing, which was to separate myself from him, it ended up really being the merciful thing. And that was the thing that turned it around for Steve. Then there are times when a woman will just have to put her foot down. But again, I always feel like I have to balance everything I say with, “you've got to be in the right spirit,” because we can operate in the flesh. It's too easy to be in the flesh and think what we're doing is mercy when it's really just your flesh causing you to be controlling. Mercy is love in action. It meets the need of another person no matter what the need is and it always costs you something. Whether emotionally, spiritually or physically. When you love someone else, you're giving of yourself. You don't do mercy to get something. Mercy is freely given. Host: And of course, the greatest example we have of mercy was Jesus. And what he did for us. Kathy: Amen.