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Lesson 2

January 8, 2023 • Michael Brennan

The reality of my ‘try-it’ agreement did not hit until just the week before summer was ending and school was beginning. Now what do I do? I wasn’t kidding - after snacks and playtime I was clueless. My plan was simple. Have a well laid plan for the first day of school, then fake it each day after that. That first day proved to be a real foretaste of the coming year. The plan was one thing, the actual unfolding of the plan proved to be another thing altogether. Here’s how it went. I was ready, really ready!! As the buses arrived, I was standing at the door with a simple three-part plan for each and every student coming into my room. 1. Greet each one at the door 2. Direct them to put their lunch boxes away and then pick a desk (big mistake) 3. Use the crayons and paper at your desk to color a picture of something you did during the summer vacation while I get a list of those buying lunch. There are times when the word “simple” has the same meaning as “foolish”. Today, it had that meaning. With a happy face plastered from ear to ear, I enthusiastically greeted all my bustling newbies, encouraging all to pick a desk and begin to color the picture. Whatever you are now picturing, STOP! That picture is not even close to the reality of that first morning of my kindergarten career. My well-rehearsed plan became an immediate disaster. The reason, in retrospect, is easy to discern. Each and every one of my newbies had themselves come with a of their own plan which totally trumped mine. Those plans fell into five categories: Category 1 - those who arrived anticipating that Kindergarten is a smaller version of an unrestricted Disneyland - meaning that immediately upon arrival it was playtime. Category 2 - those who arrived suffering from the trauma of being ripped from the clutching arms of guilt-ridden parents - meaning that immediately upon arrival I was greeted with a flood of uncontrollable tears. Category 3 - those who arrived who view me as simply the deposit box of all things brought to school - meaning that immediately upon arrival I was presented with all coats, lunch boxes, milk money, crayons, pencils, markers, extra emergency clothing, notes and etc. Category 4 - those who arrived as former gang members who would then begin patrolling the room for opportunities to harass the others - meaning that immediately upon arrival at least half of my class would be in my face with complaints of abuse. Category 5 - those who arrived with questions - lots of questions - Where do I put my coat? Where is my desk? Where do I put this envelope? What is for lunch today? Can I go to the bathroom? What do I do when I finish coloring this picture? Do I have to color this picture? Can I sit next to my friend, Sarah? What time do we go home? Meaning that immediately upon their arrival my role shifted from Teacher to Community Organizer. On a normal first day in Kindergarten, the office would buzz my intercom about twenty minutes after the buses arrived asking for our “lunch count”. That first day they gave me an extra five minutes before they buzzed. What I needed was an extra five hours. When the buzz came, I fought my way to the intercom over the din of sobs of despair, the barrage of thousands of questions, the complaints of those being harassed, and the very real threat of one child dressing to go home to Mommy, NOW! I grabbed the phone and passionately declared, “I’M STILL GREETING - CALL ME BACK IN A WEEK!!” As I slammed the phone down, I turned just in time to see that Joey was indeed very serious about going home. I bolted into the hall and caught him just as he was approaching the front door to leave. And so began my first day as a Kindergarten teacher. I would like to tell you that things settled down that day. They did - somewhat. It only took me an hour to get everybody at their desk with all issues resolved. The rest of that morning included an introduction to circle time where I quickly learned that “Let’s form a circle” is a skill that would require several practice sessions and that “sharing” was also a learned skill. The first time we did a cut and paste project, I learned that not everyone comes to school knowing what a scissor is and that glue is not a food group. I learned that bathroom time needs to be clearly explained including a brief tour of the difference between a urinal and a toilet bowl. I needed to frequently clarify that lunch was not an any-time-in-the-day option. By the time that morning was finished, I had come to the amazing conclusion that nothing was to be assumed and that everything, and I do mean - absolutely everything - needed to be explained again… and again …. and again. After lunch, we had our first story time. I, once again, quickly learned that some children love to listen, and other children love to talk. Our first outside activity time was another learning adventure. Not everyone comes to school with an ability to play. For some play time means it is now my time to terrorize the weak and defenseless. For others play means run wildly until you drop. And for others play is to be endured until one can return to the well-ordered safety of the classroom. Our first rest time included two children that fell asleep, one child that spent the entire time in the bathroom, and several children who asked me repeatedly when we could have our snacks. Not wanting to end the day as I started, I decided to begin preparing to go home with lots of time to spare. Joey had decided by this time that he would give this “Kindergarten” thing another day. Sarah had finally stopped crying and I heard her real voice for the first time. Jeremy had experienced the first of many consequences for harassing others. William was still groggy from falling asleep during rest time, and Lucy was just now discovering she had lunch milk money. Teagan was giving me a picture of a heart that she drew for me, and I was finally able to say to Kevin, “Yes, it is now time to go home.” I have no idea how I survived that first day, but I do remember clearly feeling relieved and grateful it was over. I also remember making several adjustments to my plans for the next day’s adventure. Lesson Two - WELL LAID PLANS ARE ONLY ‘WELL” IF THEY ACTUALLY WORK (“Well” might better be defined as learning to think on your feet when well laid plans explode) Rabbit Trail Lesson – Over explaining works much better than under explaining.

Lesson 1

January 1, 2023 • Michael Brennan

Lesson 2

January 8, 2023 • Michael Brennan

Lesson 3

January 15, 2023 • Michael Brennan

International Apostolic Ministries