Overcoming Sexual Sin
September 29, 2024 • R. Scott Jarrett • 2 Peter 2:13–14, Job 31:1, Proverbs 5:1–5, Romans 1:18–27, Genesis 4:7
1. If you are going to follow Christ and make it to heaven, then you must be a person characterized by sexual purity not sexual sin. (Gal 5:19 w/21; Eph 5:5; 1Th 4:1-6; 2Pe 3:14 “spotless” [Grk., aspilos = Without stain versus 2Pe 2:13-14 “eyes full of adultery” consider w/Job 31:1) = IOW: their eyes/minds are not fixed on covenant faithfulness to their wives (or God) but instead their next illicit sexual fix (Jer 2:22-24; Rev 22:15).
2. Those who struggle with sexual sin – or possess strong desires to commit sexual sin, are people guilty of idolatry.
2.1. IOW: struggles with-or strong desires to commit sexual sin, are a sure sign that the person you are dealing with is an idolator.
2.2. Idolatry is the worship of something other than the Creator, or God. You worship the creature or what is created - which in practical terms means that you trust your flesh (your senses or sense of perception) and/or the propaganda of the world (the creature v. the Creator) when determining the value of things in this life (e.g., Pro 5:1-5, 6:20-26).
2.3. The consequence of such idolatry is God’s wrath surrendering you to the power of your flesh and its sexual deviance (Rom 1:18-27) = God is incredibly angry w/those who refuse to value the things of this world according to His truth (they “suppress the truth”) – though they know He exists (He is their “Creator” and therefore the One Who knows best). They choose instead to “worship” (Grk., sebazomai = To give devotion to) the creature, to give their loyalty and trust in valuing things to what is created (i.e., their physical senses or perception and what is touted and taught as valuable by the creatures of their culture or propaganda of this world – which has always included things related to sexual pleasure). As punishment, God “[gives] them over (Grk., paradidomai = Surrenders them to the power of what they trust as the determiners of value -i.e., “the lusts of their hearts.”) which means they are now enslaved and emboldened “to impurity…[and] degrading passions.” (i.e., sexually deviant desires).
2.4. What would be a “2” on the scale of sexual temptation for the Christian (the person worshipping God) becomes a “10” for the person worshipping the creature (trusting the value system placed on things by their flesh and the world). They are now slaves to sexual sin and unable to sustain faithfulness to God (Jon 2:8; the danger of such enslavement for those already saved – 2Pe 2:18-22).
2.5. This connection between idolatry and sexual sin is testified throughout the Bible (Exo 32; Isa 57:7-8; Hos 4:12-14; 1Co 6:9-11; Gal 5:19-21; Eph 5:5; Col 3:5; Rev 2:14, 20, 21:25).
2.6. God’s act of surrendering the idolator is congruent with the moral physics established at Creation: loyalty, attraction and affection are all the function of value. IOW: those things are the result of where we chose to see value (and who or what we chose to trust as the determiner of value – the creature or the Creator) (Mat 6:21).
2.7. Why idolatry makes God so angry is because of what it says about Him and us. By choosing self (or the world) to be the ones who will decide what is valuable in this life, we are equally choosing those things to be the determiners of right and wrong. We have replaced God with ourselves as the source of such things. In essence, we have declared ourselves to be false gods and true God - expendable.
2.8. This was the sin of our original parents (Gen 3:5-7) = In choosing to violate God’s prohibition, Adam and Eve were committing the sin of idolatry. Trust in God was no longer needed, they would now be the ones determining right and wrong. Their flesh and intellect were sufficient for determining the true value of the new world they barely knew. The reign of earth’s first false gods had begun. And (once more) we are following in their footsteps when we choose to trust our flesh and the world to determine the value of things (what is right and wrong, wise or foolish, safe or dangerous, necessary or unnecessary, essential or expendable).
3. Overcoming sexual sin (and being sexually pure) therefore requires ending our idolatry - our reign as false gods, by changing who we worship from creature to Creator.
3.1. In practical terms this means we make the decision to 100% distrust what is being communicated by our flesh and the world (as to the value of things – no matter how shiny or sexy or cool) and instead give 100% of our trust to God and His Word for determining what is truly valuable. IOW: we make the decision to surrender our entire value system to God. No matter how we feel or how persuasive the world is in selling us on something, we make the decision to always view it with suspicion until we can square it with God’s Word. We refuse to consider anything as valuable, important, necessary, essential, righteous or wise unless God’s Word agrees that it is. We only place the value on things that God’s Word places on those things (Luk 16:15).
3.2. This is what it means to die to self and live for Christ which is the bare minimum requirement to following Him and getting to heaven (Mat 16:21-23 w/24).
3.3. This is also what it means to love God with our entire creature (Mar 12:29 and Exo 20; Rom 12:1 w/Jer 31:1; Consider how this is the opposite of idolatry which is loving the creature as god).
3.4. The result of worshipping the Creator will be loyalty, attraction and affection for God and the things He says are valuable (i.e., those things that are righteous, wise and safe) and disgust for the things that He says are not (i.e. those things that are wicked, foolish and dangerous) (again, Mat 6:21). IOW: faithfulness becomes completely doable (even in respect to sexual things).
4. Changing how you view sex is also a big part of how you overcome sexual sin and be sexually pure.
4.1.(Rom 12:2) = The transformation that happens when you renew your thinking is not something that happens passively. Like the previous principle, renewing your mind takes action – most especially w/respect to the subject of sex. It means making the decision to no longer think about sex the way the world thinks about it. You will only think about sex the way God thinks about sex, the way He created it.
4.2. The way the world attempts to frame sex gives you the impression that it is better – or possesses more value than God’s design – which means trusting God (or His value system) is important (here) also. IOW: I need to trust that by viewing sex His way (and rejecting the world’s view) I will not be missing out (or less blessed) in this life.
4.3. Though the way the world views and experiences sex looks superior to God’s design, it is a dark hole leading to the destruction of those things you care most about – including your soul.
4.4. Why do I say that? Because the way the world views and experiences sex creates an insatiable appetite often leading to deviant activity, sexual addiction and severed relationships – most especially marriages and families. For example, studies show that people who watch porn feel less satisfied and less connected to their spouses. Porn also creates feelings of sexual inadequacy and frustration leading to the search for help in the form of sexual products or deviant sexual activity. From a biological perspective, the hit on dopamine receptors can be similar to drugs like cocaine - creating not only addiction but the need for more –or more deviant behavior to feel the same way. At least 50% of all failed marriages and family issues are related to porn.
4.5. What (then) is difference between how the world and God view sex?
4.5.1. According to the world’s view, the goal of sexual activity is to satisfy whatever fleshly desire I am using it for (pleasure, power, approval, security, etc). Those involved in sexual activity therefore exist for utilitarian reasons. They are nothing more than the objects or instruments by which I accomplish the goal. As such, a Christian husband with this view of sex sees and treats his wife as his “in-home hooker” and his home as the “holy whorehouse.” His wife is viewed as the tool God gave him to fulfill his fleshly (or worldly) desires without being guilty of sexual immorality. As mentioned, possessing this view of sex leaves that person always wanting and needing more – leading to a preoccupation with sexual thoughts (“when are we going to have sex again?”), the need for sexual enhancement (‘what can I do to spice up our sex life or my sexual experience?”) – and in many cases, deviant sexual behavior or sexual immorality.
4.5.2. In contrast, God created all sexual activity to be a covenant ratifying act (1Co 6:16; Hos 2:1-3, 6-7)– which means this is what the pleasure it affords is meant to communicate. It is the physical celebration and communication of marital loyalty, purity and unity. Which means every time a person has sex -or is involved in sexual activity this is what they are expressing – whether they like it or not. Hence the reason God is angry with those who do it outside of marriage – because they are committing fraud. The same is true for those who are unfaithful in their marriages. Their sexual activity is communicating fidelity which in reality, is a lie. In the past, the term “love-making has been applied to sex, and understood biblically, that is an accurate description since love is defined by those three things: loyalty, purity and unity. When couples adopt God’s view and purpose for sex, satisfaction is attained every time since the expression of each other’s loyalty, purity and unity is the mission—and the mission is being accomplished by the act itself. It also brings a change in focus. It’s no longer about me getting a dopamine hit, but my wife receiving the message of my love and loyalty to her and the covenant we share. My affection through sexual activity becomes my way (per God’s design) of telling her in the most intimate or deeply emotional of ways how much I value our marriage and how faithful I have been to my covenant vows. Hence the reason (again) for it being pleasurable. It is a celebration of covenant fidelity! This (then) is what is being communicated in passages like (Gen 2:24-25 “become one flesh” = Celebrate thru sexual activity your covenant loyalty, purity and unity to one another; “were both naked” = Involved in sexual relations, intercourse; “were not ashamed” = Why? b/c what was being communicated was true: they were exclusive in their love and fidelity to one another; See also Psa 25:14 “The secret [intimacy] of the Lord is for those who fear Him; And He will make them know His covenant [fidelity] [through such intimacy].”).
4.6. This view (then) is also what is expected of those escaping the sexual immorality of the world through marriage: that they will adopt God’s view of sex in their relationship with their spouse (1Co 7:1-4) “duty” = Frequent sexual activity (or acts of sexual intimacy) communicating covenant fidelity and their rejection of former “immoralities.”
4.7. If a person is to overcome sexual sin, then they must make the choice to change to God’s view and never again think of sex in the ways presented by our flesh and the world.
5. Finally, if you are going to overcome sexual sin and reach the goal of sexual purity then you must always practice inversion.
5.1. Former vice-chairman of Berkshire Hathaway, Charlie Munger used to say to get rich (or to reach the goal of financial independence) you must “invert, always invert.”
5.2. What is inversion? Or what does it mean to “always invert”? It means that you achieve your goal by not focusing directly on the goal but avoiding all those things that can keep you from achieving your goal.
5.3. More people achieve their goals by inversion than anything else. Why? B/C it is much easier to achieve a goal (no matter what it is) by not actually focusing on the goal, but on those things that will keep you from achieving it. That (then) is the genius of inversion: achievement is attained by winning the war on the “2”s versus focusing our energy on the “10”s – which is what we are doing when we focus instead on what to avoid rather than the goal itself. (BTW) the principle of inversion did not originate with Charlie Munger, but God (Pro 22:3; 1Co 6:18).
5.4. In the case of money – or the goal of financial independence that means focusing your attention on avoiding those things that are most associated w/poverty (e.g., failing to budget, failing to understand how money works, failing to go to college, impulse spending, etc.) versus focusing your attention on how to get rich. The former is much easier to do than the latter. Statistics also show that those who focus on getting rich (or the goal of getting rich) tend to be less patient, far too risk tolerant and rarely achieve their goal (e.g., people who buy lottery tickets or gamble).
5.5. In the case of sexual purity (or overcoming sexual sin) inversion therefore means focusing your attention on avoiding those things associated with sexual immorality (e.g., sexually charged tv shows and movies, music, social media or events). It means also avoiding all thoughts that may pop up in your mind related to sexually immoral things or the temptations to lust that can come after seeing an attractive person or having a sexual dream - again, winning the war of the “2”s (Job 31:1; 2Co 10:5).
CLOSING CONTEMPLATION:
(Gen 4:7): The only way to master (or overcome) sexual sin is by trusting God’s
value system and adopting His view of sex and sexual activity. Those who don’t
master their sexual sin will be mastered by their sexual sin.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
