* Love involves two things - compassion and standards.
* You can’t have one without the other.
* Rules without relationship leads to rebellion.
* Relationship without rules leads to rejection.
* Matthew 24:12 - “because lawlessness is increased, most people’s love will grow cold.”
* When you have only compassion but no standards, you don’t have love!
* Having compassion for God and others and being willing to live within God’s standards proves our love for Him.
* This is the foundation for “knowing” Him.
1 John 2:3-6 (11/30/17)
Love
November 30, 2017 • Benham Brothers
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Lessons From I John
1 John 1:5 (11/30/17)
November 30, 2017 • Benham Brothers
* vs 5-6 - plants can’t grow in the dark. * If we claim to have a relationship with God but aren’t growing, we’re not in the Light. * vs 7 - if we walk in the light we get a reward: * Fellowship with others! * Fellowship is a byproduct of two people loving God and living for Him. * Tori and I call this “trust the triangle.” * God is the answer to all marriage problems. * vs 8 - broken fellowship (relational conflict) is always the result of TWO people. * The key to transformation is when both parties take ownership of their part of the problem. * If they don’t then the divide will remain. * vs 9 - forgiveness comes through confessing to God. * James 5:16 - healing comes through confessing to each other.
1 John 1:8-9 (12/7/22)
December 7, 2022 • Benham Brothers • 1 John 1:8–9
John wrote his three letters to help believers grow in intimacy with God. Intimacy is to be “fully known and fully accepted.” You cannot have intimacy apart from confession. Without confession, people can’t know you. If they don’t truly know you they can’t fully accept you. Vs 8 -“If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.”We have a natural tendency to hide ourselves from God and others. A cockroach hides when the light is turned on. All relationships should start with this thought - “I’m not perfect.” Vs 9 - “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”Confession opens the door for us to be fully known. God will accept our confession. Relationships cannot thrive apart from intimacy. Two parts to intimacy: 1) Fully Known - seek to be known and to know. Seek to Be Known (by God and others): All good relationships are built on vulnerability. Vulnerability is having a willingness to “open the door” (Revelation 3:20). Let God and others in! Key - Confessing to God brings forgiveness - Confessing to others brings healing (James 5:16). Human nature turns toward humility and vulnerability. When you open up, it draws God & others toward you. Seek to Know (God and others): Go after God - pursue Him to know Him. He rewards those who pursue (Jeremiah 29:13). Go after others - be a good question asker. 2) Fully Accepted - receive acceptance and be accepting. You’re accepted - those who know and love you accept you. Revelation 3:20 - God loves you and wants intimacy with you. Be accepting (of God and others). The Connection Code - the key to connection is found in two questions: Will you be there for me? (Security) Am I good enough for you? (Identity) Create an environment of emotional safety
1 John 2:7 (12/3/15)
December 3, 2015 • Benham Brothers
• John is talking about the law of love, which was an old commandment from God - Deut 10:12. • Jesus and John placed the entire weight of the law on this one command. • LAW - determines the lowest you can go. • Thou shalt not kill - we don’t walk around saying “I don’t want to kill anyone today.” • LOVE - determines the highest you should go. • Love people - we’re not supposed to “not kill,” but to bring life. • Law compels you to inaction / Love propels you to action. • Parents - there are laws against child neglect. • Love for their kids propels them to provide and protect. • This is how God’s love in our hearts takes over - we don’t need law when we have love.